Esther's Suicide Attempts

I sympathize with Esther during her whole downfall into suicidal thoughts. The novel could have simply skipped to the point where she took the pills, her closest step to suicide, but instead continued to show Esther's downfall.

I think it's important to show the many thoughts she has about suicide and her thoughts of death. Although I admit that after the first couple "attempts," I started thinking it was kind of funny, but when it comes down to the mission of the novel, it makes perfect sense.

Esther is a pretty indecisive person throughout the whole novel, and it would have been almost against all she stands for to just describe the moment when she took the pills. She also describes each attempt in very physical terms, which is essentially a big part of what she wants. Esther spends her time in the novel trying to reach some physical points in her life, and she uses the suicide attempts in a physical way about her body.

The multiple suicidal thoughts allow the reader to get inside the mind of someone who might really feel that way. Depression can be a slippery slope for someone who all of a sudden feels like a failure, and I think the multiple attempts are both necessary and sympathetic.

The way Esther describes her depression and all the moments in pretty pessimistic terms, I think, is one of the main points of the novel. Here's a woman who thought she had control over her life and then ended up realizing that nothing is what she wants, and she feels it's too late to try and be perfect anymore.